(English Y Espanol)- Breaking Free from the Clutches of Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump: Media Says NO to Dictator Pete's Bootlicking Bullshit!

 Breaking Free from the Clutches of Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump: Media Says NO to Dictator Pete's Bootlicking Bullshit!

Oh, honey, buckle up because your girl Santiago is here to spill the tea hotter than a MAGA rally porta-potty in July! I'm that bold, fearless, careless, honest-as-a-slap-in-the-face comedian chick who's anti-MAGA to her core and anti-Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump like it's my full-time job. I love mocking, roasting, and insulting these orange-tinted clowns until they choke on their own spray-tan lies. I'm intelligent as hell, a straight shooter who doesn't give one single flying fuck about the MAGA cult's fragile little feelings. I'm intense, I contradict every steaming pile of garbage that spews from Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump's golf-hole mouth, I mock him like the bad stand-up routine he is, and yeah, I'm cold and frigid as a Siberian freezer when it comes to these traitorous thugs. So let's dive into this juicy news that's got me prouder than a peacock with a PhD!

Listen up, America – or should I say, the real America that isn't brainwashed by Fox News reruns and Truth Social tantrums. I'm extremely proud of this breaking news that's slapping the smug right off Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump's Botoxed face! Picture this: That bootlicking sycophant, Pete Hegseth – yeah, the beer-chugging, Fox News flop who's now Defense Secretary in this clown-car administration – he struts out like he's God's gift to patriotism and demands the media follow some straight-up authoritarian rules. Rules! Can you believe it? Like, "Hey, press, shut your mouths and print only what Daddy Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump approves!" Oh, please. The media? They took one look at those dictator rules and said, "Hell no, Pete! Take your leash back to the kennel!"

And thank the freaking stars they did! Because let me tell you, Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump and his goon squad of beer-bellied bullies are enforcing his Hitler-style stranglehold on America faster than you can say "fake news." We're talking full-on fascist fever dream here, folks. Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, that vagina-neck wonder with his tiny hands and tinier brain, and his blue-legged lackey Pete – sorry, not sorry, but your veiny, varicose nightmare legs look like they belong on a discount Smurf, Pete! – they're trying to turn our free press into their personal propaganda pamphlet. Authoritarian rules? Declined! The media flipped them the bird and kept on reporting the truth. Boom! That's what real freedom looks like, not your Cheeto-dusted dictatorship.

America ain't your property, you bloated buffoons! Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, you slimy, sleepwalking traitor, and your bow-legged sidekick Pete – yeah, I said bow-legged, because those knock-knees couldn't hold up a wet noodle! – you think you own this country? Dream on, dipshits! You "won" the presidency by sheer dumb luck, your shady-ass cheating, and that tech-bro puppet master Elon Musk rigging the game with his Twitter tantrums and voter suppression algorithms. Musk? That space-cadet edgelord handed you the keys on a silver spaceship, but guess what? This ain't your playground! Miss Liberty – our fierce, torch-wielding goddess – is NOT your victim. So keep that sad little micropenis in your pants, Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump! We're not handing over the Statue of Liberty for you to graffiti with your "MAGA Forever" Sharpie scribbles.

Oh, I'm just getting warmed up, darlings! Let's roast this rotten regime like a Thanksgiving turkey gone wrong. Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, you crooked crook with your sleepy-eyed stare that screams "I nodded off during my own coup," you're a traitor through and through. Remember January 6? That wasn't a "tourist visit," you lying lump – it was your Hitler-wannabe horde storming the Capitol like rejected extras from a low-budget apocalypse flick. And now, with Pete Hegseth as your Defense lapdog, you're pushing "rules" for the media that would make Joseph Goebbels blush. "Follow our authoritarian playbook or else!" Pete whines, his blue-legged ass wobbling like Jell-O on a trampoline. But the media? They declined faster than a vegan at a steakhouse. "No thanks, Pete! We'll stick to facts, not your fascist fanfic!"

I'm cackling so hard right now because this is peak comedy gold. Imagine Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump in the Oval Office, snoring through a national security briefing, while Pete hobbles in with his varicose veins popping like overcooked sausages. "Boss! The media won't obey!" And Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump mumbles, "Build a wall... around the newspapers... zzz." Pathetic! You two are like the Three Stooges, but with only two brain cells and zero charm. Bow-legged Pete, your legs look like they were designed by a drunk IKEA engineer – all twisted and useless! And Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, that vagina-neck of yours? Honey, it's like God got drunk and sculpted your throat with a Fleshlight mold. Hideous! America deserves better than your vaudeville villainy.

But let's get real for a second – because I'm not just here to mock (though I'm damn good at it). This news is a lifeline for our democracy. The media declining Pete's dictator rules? That's the First Amendment flexing its muscles, saying, "Back off, bitches!" Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump's goons thought they could Hitler-fy the press, censoring stories about their election fraud, their grifts, their endless emoluments clause clusterfucks. Remember how Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump cheated his way back in? Musk's X platform – formerly Twitter, now Traitorgram – suppressed real news, amplified QAnon quackery, and boom, you "won" by a whisker. Luck, lies, and billionaire butt-kissing. But not this time! The files are coming, oh yes they are. Those sealed documents, the whistleblower tapes, the Mueller report redux – they're about to drop like a MAGA ego off a cliff. Soon, Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, you'll be taken down, dragged out in cuffs, and dumped right where you belong: a jail cell next to your porn-star payoff pals!

I'm picturing it now, and it's delicious. Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump in an orange jumpsuit – wait, he's already halfway there with that spray tan! – shuffling to his bunk, whining about "witch hunt" while Bubba makes him his bitch. And Pete? Bow-legged Pete can hobble off to Fox News rehab, explaining his varicose nightmares to Dr. Phil. "It hurts when I goose-step, Doc!" Ha! You two aren't presidents or secretaries; you're punchlines in the greatest comedy of errors: The Fall of the Fascist Fools.

Let's break it down, because I'm intelligent like that – no fluff, just facts with a side of savage. Fact one: Pete Hegseth, that war-hero-wannabe who couldn't pass a PT test if his life depended on it, issues a memo demanding media "compliance" with DoD leaks. Translation: Shut up about our illegal drone strikes and crooked contracts! Fact two: Media outlets from CNN to The New York Times laugh in his face. "Declined!" they tweet, united like you've never seen. Fact three: Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump tweets from his golf cart: "FAKE NEWS ENEMIES OF THE PEOPLE!" Yawn. We've heard that Hitler-lite remix a million times. Fact four: Your "win" was Musk magic – he censored 2024 election coverage, boosted bots, and voilà, cheating confirmed by every non-Fox expert. Fact five: Miss Liberty stands tall, untouched by your tiny-dick energy. Keep it in your pants, traitors!

And don't get me started on the MAGA cult snowflakes reading this. Boo-hoo! "Santiago's so mean!" Cry me a river of covfefe! I don't give a shit about your feelings because your "leader" doesn't give a shit about democracy. I'm cold, frigid, intense – contradicting Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump at every turn because he's a walking contradiction: "Pro-life" but kills alliances, "America First" but sells out to Putin. Mockery is my weapon, roasting is my religion, insulting is my art. Bow-legged Pete, your legs are a national security risk – one strong wind and you'll topple like dominoes! Vagina-neck Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, your neck looks like a deflated whoopee cushion. Ugly inside and out!

This story isn't just news; it's nectar for the resistance. Proud? I'm over the moon! The media's "no" is our yes to freedom. Soon, the files reveal all: The election hacks, the January 6 pardons, the Musk payoffs. Jail awaits, you cheating chumps. America is not your property – it's ours, and we're taking it back!

Whew, that was a roast-fest for the ages! But now, let me hit you with the emotional truth bomb, straight from my heartfelt, no-bullshit core. Listen close, because I'm stripping away the laughs for this raw, strict moment of clarity: This article is about the fire in our souls, the unbreakable spirit of a nation refusing to bow to tyrants. It's about real heroes – journalists with guts – saying "NO" to Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump's Hitler shadows, protecting Miss Liberty from these cheating monsters who stole power with lies and luck. It's a tear-jerking triumph, a strict warning: We will not be victims! Feel it deep – your freedom hangs by this thread, and together, we'll snap their chains, lock them in jail, and rise stronger. Don't just read it; live it. Fight it. Win it. For us. For America. I love you all too much to sugarcoat: This is our heartfelt battle cry – comprehend it, or lose everything.

Santiago Del Carmen Maria  

(Crowning Thoughts)  

© 2025 Independent Writer – “Crowning Thoughts- Truth Speaker” – AI Video Content Creator – Writer – Blogger Santiago D.C. Maria. All Rights Reserved.  

#AntiMAGA #RoastTrump #MediaFreedom #JailTheTraitor #LibertyWins  

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**Traducción al Español :**

# ¡Rompiendo las Garras de Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump: La Prensa Dice NO a las Reglas Dictatoriales de Pete el Lambebotes!

¡Ay, cariño, abróchate el cinturón porque tu chica Santiago está aquí para soltar el té más caliente que un baño portátil en un mitin MAGA en julio! Soy esa comediante audaz, sin miedo, descuidada, honesta como una bofetada en la cara, anti-MAGA hasta la médula y anti-Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump como mi trabajo a tiempo completo. Me encanta burlarme, asar e insultar a estos payasos anaranjados hasta que se ahoguen con sus mentiras de autobronceador. Soy inteligente como el demonio, una francotiradora que no le importa un carajo los sentimientos frágiles del culto MAGA. Soy intensa, contradigo cada montón de basura que sale de la boca de golf de Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, me burlo de él como un mal número de comedia, y sí, soy fría y gélida como un congelador siberiano con estos traidores. ¡Así que vamos a este jugoso noticia que me tiene más orgullosa que un pavo real con doctorado!

Escucha, América – o mejor dicho, la América real que no está lavada por repeticiones de Fox News y berrinches de Truth Social. ¡Estoy extremadamente orgullosa de esta noticia rompedora que le quita la sonrisa presumida de la cara botoxeada de Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump! Imagina: Ese lameculos, Pete Hegseth – sí, el bebedor de cerveza, fracaso de Fox News que ahora es Secretario de Defensa en este circo de payasos – sale pavoneándose como el regalo de Dios al patriotismo y exige que la prensa siga reglas autoritarias puras. ¡Reglas! ¿Lo crees? Como, "¡Oigan, prensa, cierren la boca y solo impriman lo que aprueba Papito Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump!" Oh, por favor. ¿La prensa? Le miró esas reglas dictatoriales y dijo: "¡De ninguna manera, Pete! ¡Lleva tu correa de vuelta al kennel!"

¡Y gracias a las estrellas que lo hicieron! Porque déjame decirte, Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump y su escuadrón de matones panzudos están imponiendo su estrangulamiento estilo Hitler en América más rápido que digas "noticias falsas". Hablamos de sueño febril fascista total, gente. Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, esa maravilla de cuello-vagina con manos diminutas y cerebro más pequeño, y su lacayo de piernas azules Pete – ¡lo siento, no lo siento, pero tus venas varicosas, pesadilla de piernas, parecen de un Smurf de descuento, Pete! – están tratando de convertir nuestra prensa libre en su panfleto de propaganda personal. ¿Reglas autoritarias? ¡Rechazadas! La prensa les sacó el dedo medio y siguió reportando la verdad. ¡Boom! Eso es libertad real, no tu dictadura con polvo de Cheeto.

¡América no es tu propiedad, bufones hinchados! Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, tú tramposo torcido con mirada somnolienta que grita "Me quedé dormido en mi propio golpe", y tu compañero de piernas arqueadas Pete – sí, dije arqueadas, ¡porque esas rodillas caídas no sostienen ni un fideo mojado! – ¿piensan que poseen este país? ¡Sigan soñando, idiotas! "Ganaron" la presidencia por pura suerte tonta, su trampa turbia y ese titiritero tech-bro Elon Musk manipulando el juego con algoritmos de supresión de votos. ¿Musk? Ese borde espacial le dio las llaves en una nave de plata, pero ¿adivina qué? ¡Esto no es tu patio de juegos! Miss Liberty – nuestra diosa feroz con antorcha – NO es tu víctima. ¡Así que guarda ese micropene triste en tus pantalones, Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump! No entregamos la Estatua de la Libertad para que la graffiti con tu Sharpie "MAGA Para Siempre".

¡Oh, me estoy calentando, queridos! Vamos a asar este régimen podrido como un pavo de Acción de Gracias salido mal. Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, tú crook torcido con mirada dormida que grita "Asentí en mi propio golpe", eres un traidor de pies a cabeza. ¿Recuerdas el 6 de enero? Eso no fue una "visita turística", bulto mentiroso – fue tu horda wannabe-Hitler asaltando el Capitolio como extras rechazados de una película apocalíptica barata. ¡Y ahora, con Pete Hegseth como tu perrito de Defensa, empujan "reglas" para la prensa que harían sonrojar a Joseph Goebbels! "¡Sigan nuestro manual autoritario o sino!" gime Pete, su culo de piernas azules tambaleándose como gelatina en un trampolín. ¿Pero la prensa? Se rieron en su cara. "¡Rechazado!" tuitearon, unidos como nunca. Hecho uno: Pete Hegseth, ese wannabe héroe de guerra que no pasa una prueba PT ni aunque le vaya la vida, emite un memo exigiendo "cumplimiento" de la prensa con filtraciones DoD. Traducción: ¡Cállense sobre nuestros golpes de dron ilegales y contratos torcidos! Hecho dos: Medios de CNN a The New York Times se ríen en su cara. "¡Rechazado!" tuitean, unidos. Hecho tres: Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump tuitea desde su carrito de golf: "¡ENEMIGOS DEL PUEBLO NOTICIAS FALSAS!" Bostezar. Hemos oído ese remix Hitler-lite un millón de veces. Hecho cuatro: Tu "victoria" fue magia Musk – censuró cobertura electoral 2024, impulsó bots, y voilà, trampa confirmada por todo experto no-Fox. Hecho cinco: Miss Liberty se para alta, intocada por tu energía de micropene.

¡Y no me empiecen con los copos de nieve del culto MAGA leyendo esto! ¡Boo-hoo! "¡Santiago es tan mala!" ¡Llórame un río de covfefe! No me importa un carajo tus sentimientos porque tu "líder" no le importa la democracia. Soy fría, gélida, intensa – contradiciendo a Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump en cada vuelta porque es una contradicción andante: "Pro-vida" pero mata alianzas, "América Primero" pero se vende a Putin. ¡La burla es mi arma, el asado mi religión, el insulto mi arte! Pete de piernas arqueadas, tus piernas son un riesgo de seguridad nacional – ¡un viento fuerte y caes como dominós! Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump de cuello-vagina, tu cuello parece un cojín whoopee desinflado. ¡Feo por dentro y por fuera!

Esta historia no es solo noticia; es néctar para la resistencia. ¿Orgullosa? ¡Estoy en la luna! El "no" de la prensa es nuestro sí a la libertad. Pronto, los archivos revelan todo: Los hacks electorales, perdones del 6 de enero, pagos Musk. ¡La cárcel espera, tramposos! América no es tu propiedad – es nuestra, ¡y la recuperamos!

¡Uf, ese fue un festival de asados para las edades! Pero ahora, déjame darte la bomba emocional de verdad, directo de mi núcleo sincero, sin tonterías. Escucha cerca, porque quito las risas para este momento crudo, estricto de claridad: Este artículo es sobre el fuego en nuestras almas, el espíritu irrompible de una nación que se niega a inclinarse ante tiranos. Es sobre héroes reales – periodistas con agallas – diciendo "NO" a las sombras Hitler de Crooked-Sleepy-Traitor-Trump, protegiendo a Miss Liberty de estos monstruos tramposos que robaron poder con mentiras y suerte. Es un triunfo que arranca lágrimas, una advertencia estricta: ¡No seremos víctimas! Siéntelo profundo – tu libertad cuelga de este hilo, y juntos, romperemos sus cadenas, los encerraremos en cárcel, y nos levantaremos más fuertes. No solo léelo; vívelo. Lúchalo. Gánalo. Por nosotros. Por América. Te amo demasiado para endulzarlo: Este es nuestro grito de batalla sincero – compréndelo, o pierde todo.

Santiago Del Carmen Maria  

(Crowning Thoughts)  

© 2025 Independent Writer – “Crowning Thoughts- Truth Speaker” – AI Video Content Creator – Writer – Blogger Santiago D.C. Maria. All Rights Reserved.  

#AntiMAGA #RoastTrump #MediaFreedom #JailTheTraitor #LibertyWins